G Man Months 0-3

Since it's my baby's birthday week, I am going to recap months 0-3. Mostly for my own reflection on what a sweet, immobile, snuggle, newborn was like. That seems like yesterday! Baby fever anyone??

Month 1 - Little Travelin' Man

I got to stay an extra 36 hours in the hospital with jaundice. My Grammy Tammy stayed with us for a week and helped my Mommy out. After Grammy Tammy went home, I decided to start puking on my Mommy and ended up back in the hospital (2wks) just so they could tell my Mom that I am a completely normal baby boy. I went to my first county fair in Martinsville (3wks), spent the first night at my Grammy and Grandfather’s house in Columbus (3 wks), made it to the Indiana State Fair to watch the cattle show (3wks), took my Grandfather Mark to lunch for his birthday with my cousin Owen in Indianapolis (3 wks), went to my first wedding (4 wks), and spent the night with my Grandma and Grandpa Dickerson (4wks). I like to eat every +/- 4 hours and sometimes I sleep 6 hours at night. I smile at my Mama and Daddy and coo in my sleep. Today, I decided I had enough tummy time and rolled over to my back. I probably won’t do that again for a long time. I am a good boy and rarely cry. I have had 2 play dates with my 2^nd cousin Will. I never want my mommy to go back to school (ok, maybe that’s my mom talking)!

Clearly a victim of the baby talk bug...is that a sign of postpartum blissdom? or just annoying....

Month 2 - Travels well with Others 

How he has changed! He weighs 12 lbs 11 oz and is 23 inches long. He eats every 4 hours and will still go an occasional 6 hour stretch at night. In the last month - Graham has been to 2 cattle sales, shopping on the Magnificent Mile in Chicago, another wedding reception, Weston’s Baby Shower, and out to dinner with my Mom and Dad at Red Lobster! Graham likes to go for walks with his Mama and doggy. He finds bright things and focuses on them and likes to keep his eye on his Mom and Dad. He is becoming more tolerant of tummy time and loves bath time. He is in 0-3 months/3 months clothing and can't wear newborn clothes anymore. Contrary to this picture, he smiles a lot - just not for the camera. He is his father's son!

 Look at that alien sweet face! 

Month 3 - I smile!

This month has been a BIG one! Graham got his first cold after coming home from Chicago and it seemed to last forever. 10 days of coughing and hacking. We got a Crane cool mist humidifier and it worked magic. Graham really developed a personality this month and smiled a lot. He visited daycare a few times in preparation to start full time. I (mom) went back to work on October 15 – two days after he turned 3 months old and one day after he stopped sleeping through the night. The whole month he had been sleeping 6-8 hours until I went back to work. We’re still working on sleeping! We went to get pumpkins and Daddy picked out the perfect one. Mom going back to work has definitely been an adjustment. Grandma Tammy and Grandma Diana helped out by watching him a couple days the first week. He goes to an excellent Daycare and Ms. Cathy takes great care of him! If it can’t be me, I couldn't pick anyone better. Doctor next month and Shots ...eeek!

 And now I must be reminded that babies don't stay babies forever...

Oh, hey Mama...I'll get my own snacks - thanks

 Phot0 Courtesy of Shannon Henry Photography

Graham's Birth Story

We are officially 1 week away from our little man's FIRST birthday! How can that even be possible?!? The past year has been the best year of our lives. With his birthday approaching, I thought it would be appropriate to dedicate the next 7 days to highlight the "BIG" things that have happened in the last 365. Let's start off the countdown with his birth story, which I journaled as a letter to Graham when we got home from the hospital.


Your Birth Story

Well, the doctor finally said we should help motivate you. At 41 weeks, an induction was scheduled. We had an appointment on Thursday afternoon, Dr. Fagan said that I was 1.5 centimeters dilated and we could schedule the induction. She called the hospital and scheduled us for 6 am the following Friday morning, Friday the 13^th. We left the dr’s office and went home to spend our last night together as a family of two. We packed our bags, went out for Chinese, took a family photo, and went to bed early. I (Mommy) was up by 4:30 the next morning to get ready to meet you. I had to get ready! We made it to the hospital, got checked in, IV started, and then we got bad news. Dr. Brandenstein said that I was not dilated enough for her to break my water. I was so mad, sad, frustrated, and over it! Without another option, we headed back home, very upset. Grandpa and Grandma Hege were already here and expecting to meet you. Mommy and Daddy decided to go for a walk to help with the frustration and passing of the time until the doctors office opened. Once I got a hold of Dr. Fagan, I told her how upset and frustrated I was. After speaking with her, we headed back to the hospital around 11:30 for her to do the induction herself. Got settled back in to the same room and began to walk the halls waiting for Dr. Fagan. She arrived around 1:00 pm to break my water. At this point, I was already between 3-4 centimeters dilated and having contractions on my own. Once my water was broken, I was stuck in the bed for the duration of the labor. About 15 minutes after Dr. Fagan broke my water, the nurse started pitocin. The pitocin really intensified the contractions right away. About an hour and a half after the pitocin had started, the contractions were really painful and I was ready to be checked again. I made a deal with myself that if I had progressed then I would go ahead and get the epidural. Good news, I had made it to 4-5 and said, let’s have those drugs! The anesthesiologist took no time getting in our room and setting up the epidural. Daddy had a tough time during the epidural – I thought he was going to faint! The dr. asked me if I had a metal taste in my mouth and Daddy said – I do! All of the nurses laughed and then told him to sit down. Mommy was on her own. The epidural was more painful than I expected it to be, but it was so worth it. Once we got settled back in, the epidural started to creep up my chest and my blood pressure started dropping. Daddy called the nurses and they had to turn the epidural down, and give me some medicine to help things return to normal. Then – it was nap time. Daddy was in charge of informing the family of my progress and I just relaxed. I had made it to 5, 2 hours later I was at 7 and then next time I got checked it was time to push. I began to push with each contraction and had about 45 seconds-1minute to rest between. Daddy was quiet during this time until I told him I needed him to spit out his gum and count to 10! Each contraction yielded 3 hard pushes. After 45 minutes of pushing, I experienced the most amazing feeling in the world. You were born at 11:59 pm and you were a BOY! I was so convinced you were going to be a girl, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. You were perfect and when you cried I felt an overwhelming joy that I’ll never be able to put in to words. After holding you for a second, they whisked you away to check you out. I could see you and I watched the whole time. After a short time, I got you back. You nursed right away and I fell in love with you more as each second passed. I thought I loved your Dad before you were born, but that love intensified so much more the second I saw him with you. We decided to name you Graham Jacob Dickerson. You were 8 lbs 4.5 oz, 20 ½ inches long. Your head and chest were 14 inches. You have 10 perfect fingers and 10 perfect toes. You are calm and you rarely cry. You look exactly like your Dad in every way possible. He is so excited that he has a SON.

High Five for Friday

I read quite a few other blogs and Kate at The Small Things blog does a High Five for Friday post each week highlighting the best parts of her week. I thought it would be a good week to start this since it is a Holiday week/end and lots of fun things going on. 

Here we go!

1. Little man decided to start walking. The very first time he did it, he stood up, took 2 steps, and immediately started crying. Cutest thing ever. 

2. Hub's last day of work at his current job was Tuesday and he has some time off before he starts his new job. Lots of Family time up in he'ah.

3. I've been packing like I work for Two Men and a Truck. At this rate, we'll be wearing the same outfit and eating off the same plate for at least a week.

4. My family rocks! Two full days of packing help was very much appreciated. G was a big fan of entertaining the help.

5. Our best friends invited us to their family get together for July 4th. It was a sweet gesture and the whole family made us feel loved and welcome. We hit the jackpot with these friends. They are lifers, whether they like it or not!

Cheers to Friday and 'Merica!

Attack of the Deer Fly

This morning I made breakfast for my boys and then sent them on their adventure. They headed to see the Grandparents and left Mama to keep on packin'. I waited until they had left before I laced up my running shoes (which was much simpler without my G man hanging on my leg), put in my ear buds (another luxury) and hit the running trail. This is usually at least a 6 step process: Get myself dressed, G man dressed, feed G breakfast, attempt to lace up my shoes, strap G man into the stroller, and round up the dog.

I felt great without the usual 45 lbs of baby and stroller I'm used to pushing. I'm literally trucking along, making pretty good time for a fat kid, when BAM...the deer fly gang identified me as an intruder in their space and began to plan my take down. This was shortly after the Great Pyrenees tried to take out my pansy ass Border Collie and scared the remaining 0.5% of oxygen left in my lungs right out of them.

The attack began with 1, and quickly multiplied into a gang of 100. They were going for the Jugular. I was swatting left and right, jumping up and down, shimmying, shaking, and spinning around just to try to get these damn things off me. It was about that time I realized I had made it back to the home of the Great Pyrenees, whose owner's were probably laughing their hearts out inside their window at the idiot attempting to run by their guard dog.

I made it out alive with only 1 welt from the deer fly gang. Don't worry, pesky little flies, I'll be back with ammunition next time. 

Remember when I said you should stake yourself on my running route for a good dose of free entertainment? Well today was not a let down for the neighbors. Happy Wednesday!

Transitions

It's 'bout time I elaborated on my last post. Frankly, it's 'bout time I posted at all. It appears as though 45 people viewed my page when I blogged last and I don't want to let the 5 of you down that read my blog 9 times each. Thanks for boosting my confidence.

We're getting ready to go through a pretty drastic transition in our little, simple life. Let me just start with saying that we don't ever do anything lightly around here. Balls to the wall is the only language I speak. I started looking for job opportunities this past winter. Christmas has always been a stressful time with traveling all over the place and hauling an infant didn't make it any simpler. We decided to start looking and see what happened. I got a phone call this May from a dear friend telling me she would be resigning from her position as Ag Teacher / FFA Advisor at a little school approx 7 min from where I grew up. After much consideration, I applied for the job. Decided we would discuss it further if they wanted to interview me...and then we would have a decision to make if I was offered the job. The interview felt so right that I hoped they would offer me the job. As luck God would have it, they offered and I accepted. Here's to new beginnings!

So, here we sit - wondering what C will do for a job. And then, as if it hasn't all been so perfect and easy up to this point. He gets an interview, followed quickly (practically instantly) by a job offer. He accepts and now we are two gainfully employed individuals in the region I grew up. What's next? Well, a house I guess. We need to sell ours, find a new place to make home, and pack all of our belongings. 

In the next 30 days, we still need to sell our house (ideally), box up this little packed house, move (location TBD), and start two new jobs. G will need new childcare and I just found out I'll be a district adviser for this school year. Quite an honor, but a whole new list of responsibilities. We'll also be throwing in a 1st birthday party in the mix. Remember when I said balls to the wall is the only language I speak? I think that translates to 1-way ticket to the Crazy house. 

We are so blessed and so looking forward to these new opportunities. I know our house will sell in due time and we will find a place to live. While I am incredibly excited, I'm also sad to leave behind 3 years worth of memories in our first home. This is where we first moved in together, shared many great nights with friends, and brought home our son (in his perfectly decorated nursery). So many people have helped this town feel like home and have become our extended family. I'm going to miss them so much. I hope they'll come to our New Year's party at our new house and litter our new yard with beer cans to ensure the neighbors we bring a little redneck to the neighborhood. Cheers to Smooth Transitions and a lot of beer to make it seem that way.

Boo Ya!

Do you ever have those days where you just feel like you dominated the world?!? Like, boo ya biatch I owned these 24 hours...

No? That's just me? Shit, I was sure there were others of you that felt so immensely blessed that you just didn't know what to do with yourselves.(All 5 of my readers...) 

On days like this, I wonder when/if it will all come crashing down. Depressing, right? Just human nature I suppose, but for now....I'm going to soak in all of this wonderfulness. The calm before the storm. 

You know the saying, What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you thanked God for today? Well, my list is pretty long tonight and I want to make sure it is all still there tomorrow. Soooo, here goes:

• Husband - When my heart feels this full, I wonder how I could ever love him more...and then he finds a way for me to fall more in love with him (conspiracy, I'm sure...)
• Opportunity - New, old, and undiscovered...I'm thankful for it all
• Parents - better than yours, guaranteed
• Siblings - better than yours, don't fight it
• Friends - near, far...I love them all
• My son - seriously, I'd put every damn bumper sticker I could find on my car to let you know how awesome he is...and your bulldog ain't got nothin on my honor roll student (11 months old...too soon?)
• Blessings - they're abundant and I thank Him for every single one of them
• Sunshine with a Breeze - perfect way to get a sunburn Tan
• Cows - if I woke up tomorrow without these black beauties, my world would be awry
• Faith - 'nuff said
• Chocolate

What are you thankful for? If your list is shorter tonight, find the silver lining - because someone ALWAYS has it worse than you. #abundantlyblessed

Judgement

I'm human, I understand this...but it doesn't mean I don't have a battle with myself over judgement. I find myself judging myself and others way too often. Now that I am home from school and spending all day, every day with my handsome little man these judgements come more often than I would like. 

As I attempt to go to the restroom, while my son pulls himself practically up onto my lap - I wish for 1 minute to myself. I just want to pee alone...And then, I judge myself. Why am I so selfish? There are mothers who wish for 1 more minute with the children they have lost, women who await motherhood that wish for 1 minute with a baby...and I am wishing for 1 minute without mine.

When I log on to facebook and see pictures of people going out, doing things, taking couples/friends vacations, I judge them. I wonder when they'll grow up, why they feel the need to continue to act like 21 yr olds, how can they be away from their kids for that long?!? And then - I realize I'm a bit jealous of them. I can count on 1 hand the number of times my husband and I have been "out", away from our son since the day he was born. I'm envious of their ability to still be an individual and a couple. I wish for the time to do those things, but realize I'm the only one that can make that time. When we do make the time to go out, I give myself a guilt trip the ENTIRE time. I check on him, check the time, talk about him, and countdown the hours, minutes until I can get back to him. 

I don't just judge parents...I judge everyone. I see a person walking down the street and wonder why they don't have a car. I look at the person wearing shorts on a cold day and wonder why they didn't think to put pants on that morning. I drive past a hitch hiker and automatically assume that bad choices led them to be alone, on the side of the road. 

What if the person walking down the street decided to take in the beauty of the outdoors for a day? What if they don't have a car, but are still making the effort to go to work? What if the kid with shorts on in the winter doesn't have pants? Or a TV to check the weather that morning? What if a hitch hiker wants to spread God's word and just needs a passerby to pick him/her up and listen?

Why am I so judgmental?  I desperately wish to have an open mind and open heart, but am stopped by my human thoughts all the time. I know that other people judge me when I am the mom with the screaming, messy kid in a restaurant...or the mom with the kid who can't be still and quiet through a church service. But I like to believe he brings joy to someone's open heart. 

I'm human and I'll never fully stop judging people/things/situations, but I hope  my  "good" side always wins the internal battle and I can see the good in every situation.